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Diets

Fun Facts About Chocolate

If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
 
Problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car?  Solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
 
Diet Tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal.  It will take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
 
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. (But if you can't eat all your chocolate, it may be a sign of a deeper problem.)
 
Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.
 
If not for chocolate, the entire clothing industry would be devastated.
 
Kent Crockett's Sermon Illustrations, www.kentcrockett.com


When To Go on a Diet

An overweight husband asked his petite wife, "Have you seen my belt around the house?"
"Is it around the house???" she asked.
Kent Crockett's Sermon Illustrations, www.kentcrockett.com


Fun Facts About Dieting

One of life's mysteries is how a two-pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds.
 
Brain cells come and go, but fat cells live forever.
 
Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but she can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.
 
Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes.
 
I had to give up jogging for my health.  My thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
 
I recently joined a diet clinic and in just ten days I lost $1,000.
 
If God meant for us to touch our toes, He would have put them farther up our body.
 
I'm on a holistic diet.  I'm not going to eat anything but donuts.
 
DIET: What you keep putting off while you keep putting on.
 
DIETING: Mind over platter.
 
I never count calories.  But my body does.
 
A woman looked at her shadow on Groundhog Day and predicted six weeks of dieting.
 
Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
Kent Crockett's Sermon Illustrations, www.kentcrockett.com


Cross Reference:

The Evolution into Santa Claus

George Foreman Lost 85 Pounds

Do the Math

Famine in the Land


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